Escape.

Jump and touch the sky.

Sweetness.

I can touch the sky. And I'm not used to this. I've almost forgotten what it feels like to feel great and filled with happiness. I throw away sadness and ill-being. And I feel Good. I was locked up in the dark for so long that I thought brightness wouldn't come now. And I know I deserve it. I've been hurt for so many times before that now I deserve to be happy and to have a great weight off my mind.
It was just a matter of time...

Appeased.

I thought that nobody would touch me like he did it. I thought that no one would be able to make me feel good. I thought that sadness would be my best friend for a while. I thought that I couldn't let anyone crash into my life. I thought I was locked up in a world that wasn't mine, in a life that was full of memories taking me back to him. Then, you arrived. And you changed everything. You give me affection that nobody gave me. You are the one who kiss me when I sleep. The one who say that you missed me when I come back home. You are the one that makes me realize that good boys still exist. And I want to thank you for the strength you give me every time I see your smile.

Can't wait to see you burn.

I hate you. More than you can imagine. I hate your cowardice, your selfishness, your lack of empathy. I hate your lack of conscience telling you everything is alright. I hate how you moved on so fast. I hate how you left me behind. I hate how badly you changed my life and how you changed me. I hate my fucking broken heart and I hate what I became because of you. I hate your face, I hate your name. I hate your stupid way of thinking. And I hate myself for still writing and speaking about you.

Chaos.

Chaos in my head. Chaos in my heart. Chaos in my body. Chaos in my feelings. Chaos in my thoughts. Chaos in my hopes. Chaos in my wishes. Chaos in my relationships. Chaos in my life.

Left behind.

M'as tu écoutée quand j'essayais de te parler ? Est ce que tu te souciais de ce que j'étais en train de traverser ? C'est comme tu ne m'avais jamais connue. Sais tu à quel point ça fait mal ? Je ne trouve même plus les mots. What the hell's wrong with you ?

Everything is Nothing.

Confiance destructive. Ignorance protectrice. Haine d'exister. Coeur sanglant. Calvaire et torture. Oppression constante. Je me noie dans l'absence, le temps et les maux.

Broken down.

Suis-je censée avoir envie de me lever le matin lorsque je sais que la date fatidique s'approche à grands pas ? Que je suis entourée d'hypocrites ? Que la Soeur, la Poupée et la Warrior sont à des centaines de kilomètres de mon pauvre coeur abimé et de mes bras qui les attendent avec impatience ? Il doit bien exister un moyen de faire abstraction de tout ces maux...

On pourrait presque toucher le paradis, si seulement le retour à la réalité n'était pas si difficile.

Insane.

Je m'efforce de ne rien oublier. Et quand ma tête me dit de lâcher prise et de jeter les armes le coeur est là pour m'en empêcher. Chaque parole, chaque image, chaque larme et chaque geste est soigneusement gardé quelque part, rien n'est effacé. C'en est détestable. Toutes ces dates, impatientes d'abimer un peu plus mon coeur. Et quand la situation n'est pas déjà assez dramatique je sais comment l'aggraver, je sais comment passer des soirées, des journées entières à me torturer l'esprit. Un jour il faudra que j'arrête. Un jour...

Sparks.